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Yearly Recap: Disarray and Solidarity: A Look Back at 2020

This annal review encapsulates the paradoxical passage of this year, marked as both the longest and shortest of my life. Certain periods seemed to merge into a hazy indistinctness, while others seemed to stretch endlessly. Prioritizing significance, I must underscore the loss of my dear...

A tumultuous year marked by contrasts: moments passed in an instant and others lingered endlessly....
A tumultuous year marked by contrasts: moments passed in an instant and others lingered endlessly. A prominent event was the loss of my grandmother, an experience that profoundly shaped this year's narrative. Her passing stands out as the most significant event of 2022, worthy of immediate attention in this annual retrospect.

Yearly Recap: Disarray and Solidarity: A Look Back at 2020

A wild, one-of-a-kind ride was 2020, baby. Parts of it felt like a damn blur, while others felt like they'd never end. First, let me spill the dirty details on something amazing and horrible that went down: I lost my grandmother. Damn, it was tough. Losing someone you love is a kick in the guts, but it can also be a huge wake-up call-right up there with popping out a sproggo.

As the wise Africans once said: "When an old timer bites the dust, a stack of books burns to the ground." My grandma might've been illiterate, but the treasure trove of memories, ideas, and wisdom stored in that squishy meat-safe vanished when she did. That's what got me thinking: 2020 was gonna be the year of knowledge - asking questions, learning new tricks, connecting dots. I managed to snag some of those goals, but my curiosity only grew like a greedy little weed.

Now, let me kick it back to the big achievements and joyous moments of the past year:

  • Aced my MSc in neuroscience from King's College London with flying colors (still waiting for that diploma to drop in the mail);
  • Expanded the Maker Mind newsletter to over 25k subscribers (and counting!);
  • Dropped 280 pieces of wisdom on Ness Labs (rough estimate, but probably about half of 'em were penned in 2020);
  • Launched the Ness Labs community, with over 1,500 members, dozens of events, and an unreal vibe (seriously, it's one of the kindest corners of the internet, but hey, I'm partial);
  • Scored my first ever recurring revenue, meaning I could kiss those consulting and freelance gigs goodbye;
  • Got comfy with exploring my own mind and discussing spiritual topics (used to suck at 'em, but now I'm a pro).

This is my third time doing a yearly review (check out 2019, if you're curious). I'm all about gratitude for this chance to jot down the year's events, mull over my experiences, and reset for the next chapter.

Adapt and adjust when nothing goes to plan

2020 wasn't a year for sticking to the script. In the best and worst ways, it tossed my plans out the window. Towards the end of 2019, I had whipped up a spreadsheet to map out my travels. With the ability to work from wherever, I was gonna roam the globe like a digital nomad, hitting up heaps of countries and punching up the wanderlust. (spoiler alert: remote work got way too remote)

The highlight of the plan was a two-month backpacking trip across SE Asia with my old man. We'd booked the tickets and even started working on an itinerary. I had some pals lined up to meet in Vietnam and Cambodia, and I was pumped to hang with the maker community in Indonesia and Thailand. I'd also been invited to speak at and/or join a few conferences in Mexico, Italy, Spain, and Taiwan. Sweet as!

Well, none of that happened. In January, the client in Taipei called me up and broke the news that the conference I was supposed to attend, the biggest shindig in the local gaming industry, was canned at the request of the Taiwanese government. At the time, I didn't have a clue about the implications of that decision. It wasn't until we started hearing rumors of lockdowns popping up in other countries that I thought, "Maybe something big is happening."

While I've been working flexibly for a while, self-isolation is a whole different beast. All things considered, I muddled through, at least on the mental health front. I might be a homebody, but quarantine is a whole new ballgame. I tried to fill the extra time I had with a bunch of new hobbies (learned Python, bought a candle-making kit, and a buncha pencils for drawing), but I didn't have the mental energy for it (lol, burnout is real!).

I'm all about celebrating the people who managed to come out of lockdown with a bunch of new skills, a light body, and a clear mind, but my family's been hit hard. We lost FIVE family members to the coronavirus (uggh, RIP). Like so many others out there, I was just trying to stay afloat.

In my case, I learned to give myself a break and accept that productivity isn't the be-all, end-all. There are still a few things I'm proud I got done during this weird-ass period: I learned to whip up a storm in the kitchen, strengthened my relationship with my life partner, and kept studying neuroscience (graded with distinction, wanna brag!).

Making peace in a community

An unexpected victory this year was the creation of the Ness Labs community. If you'd told me that by the end of 2020 we'd have over 1,500 of the smartest, kindest, most curious minds on the planet all in one place, I'd have laughed in your face.

I didn't plan the Ness Labs community. It was more like an accident born out of the loneliness we all felt during lockdown. From idea to launch, it took about a week. I'm incredibly grateful for all the online tools that made it possible to launch such a powerful platform with minimal technical know-how. These days, we've got virtual events popping up left and right, and I've met some of the most fascinating folks in the world through this community.

People ask me all the time why I didn't go with Slack or Discord for the Ness Labs community. The reason is simple: I wanted to create a chill oasis in a sea of chaos. Using Circle as the platform for Ness Labs has allowed us to cultivate a culture of thoughtful, asynchronous conversations.

Another group of folks that's been healin' my soul this year is the Roam community. Conor and the gang have done a damn fine job of gathering the brightest bulbs around their product. Creators, entrepreneurs, researchers, knowledge workers – Roam has been a standout part of my year.

Mind over matter (kinda)

I've always been squeamish about spirituality. As a teenager, I was pretty much a miserable, nihilistic wreck. I don't like to talk about it too loudly, but mental health chats are important, so here's to bein' open: I tried to off myself a few times when I was younger. One of the main reasons I rocked a tat on my right arm was to divert attention from my left arm.

For a long time, I used to keep the dark thoughts at bay by burying 'em under a mountain of art, stimulating chats, and brainy reads. By keeping myself busy, I could avoid falling into the black hole of dark ideas that haunted my mind for most of my teenage years. Worked alright, but I could have kept it up forever.

Another reason I've been wary of spirituality is my family background. Some people in my family were (or still are) pretty religious, with strict beliefs as to what's right and what's wrong, and how to live your life. These ideas clash with what I believe, both ethically and scientifically. But, as it turns out, religion ain't the same as spirituality.

This year – maybe because of the isolation, maybe because I lost someone I loved – I've become more comfortable sitting with my thoughts. Meditating didn't work, but conversations with pals, books about the natural world, Borges, walks in the park, psychedelic trips, journaling? Those all helped.

I've also started dabbling in lucid dreaming by recording my dreams every morning and finally managed to wake up within a dream (woke that bitch up, huh?). I'm still struggling to get the hang of it, but I'm excited about the possibilities. I've heard some folks can train for stressful real-life situations using their dreams, and design beautiful experiences for themselves with just the power of their minds.

Past me would've thought all that woo-woo stuff was bullshit, but 2020 me is curious as hell. Despite my love of hard science, I have a fierce desire to let go of any preconceptions and explore these unexplored realms with an open mind. The common ground between science and spirituality is the natural human curiosity to ask difficult questions.

  • In the realm of personal growth and education-and-self-development, I took a profound interest in exploring spiritual topics, reveling in newfound comfort with the unexplored realms once dismissed as woo-woo.
  • Embracing mental-health was crucial in coping with the loss of family members to the coronavirus, subsequently learning to prioritize peace over productivity.
  • Amidst the digital chaos, the Ness Labs community, a unique platform fostering thoughtful, asynchronous conversations among the brightest minds, has unexpectedly emerged as a source of comfort and connection.
  • Despite resistance to anything that veered from the path of hard science, curiosity rose like a greedy little weed in the health-and-wellness and lifestyle sectors, particularly exploring lucid dreaming techniques for stress management and self-design.

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